Dealing with insecurity is hard enough, but irrational insecurity is just crazy-making! And painful.
If you've spent any time at all on the Straight Talk for a Curvy World® blog, you've probably seen the images at the top of the main page. The ones with these words:
My doubt does not guide me: I AM Purposeful
My fear does not stop me: I AM Courageous
My disease does not define me: I AM Strong
These reminders are so valuable, I've even created free printable I AM wall art with these messages on them just for you. You'll find the link to get them at the end of this post.
Sharing these words and the free wall art is as much for you as it is for me.
Words to turn to and repeat over and over as often as necessary to make them real. Especially when insecurity rears it's ugly head. Using the right I AM statements is essential for self-care.
And I've been turning to these words a lot recently.
I haven't figured out whether I'm having a flare or if my medication has stopped working. All I know for sure is my daily pain has increased tenfold, and it's having a significant impact on my mood and well-being.
And in my mindset.
Irrational insecurity has been running rampant.
Right along with the pain. And it's not selective, either. I've been fighting insecurity around my appearance, my writing, my finances, my parenting and my relationship.
Now, as I've shared before, I've spent a lifetime battling insecurity, so it's not like I'm unfamiliar with the feelings. What's really ticking me off is the irrational part in all of this.
And you know what makes irrational insecurity worse?
Keeping it a secret.
Just like shame, irrational insecurity cannot survive in fresh air. As soon as we speak the words out loud to another, they begin to lose power over us, and the darkness starts to fade.
When I finally told Big D how my increased pain had increased my insecurity, I immediately felt lighter. Speaking the words out loud and being heard by someone who loves me was all it took. (And it doesn't hurt to have my I AM wall art everywhere I look, either, as a constant reminder.)
No idea why this lesson keeps presenting itself to me. I mean, it's not like I don't know this stuff.
Ok, that's not true, I know why . . .
It's because when the pain starts to takes over, it's so damn easy to let it. Keeping a positive mental attitude takes work, A LOT OF WORK, especially when our bodies are fighting against us.
All of this makes me remember how positive my Dad was. When he lost 90% of his eyesight and then again, near the end of his life, when the depression and anxiety were showing up more frequently. He continued to remain optimistic and positive, telling me how much better he felt by talking to me about it. He also reminded me how important it is to talk to ourselves in a positive way – that's why the printable I AM wall art is so helpful. (See, I told you I knew this stuff!)
Yep. Talking about it is the not-so-secret, secret. Dad knew that and after talking with Big D, I know it too. (again)
Now to remember this lesson, even in the midst of pain!
Did I mention how helpful the I AM wall art is for remembering? Print them off, hang them on the wall, put them in your planner, laminate them, whatever makes sense for you. I printed multiple copies and have them everywhere. And you can get them free at the end of this post.
If you've been holding something in or dealing with irrational emotions and insecurity, consider sharing with someone who cares. It really does make a difference, I promise!
This experience inspired me, and I've created another I AM reminder and mantra for all of us dealing with chronic pain (or the emotional pain of irrational insecurity no matter where it comes from):
My pain does not control me: I AM Resilient.
You can get your four free printable I AM wall art right here:
Living with Chronic Illness or Chronic Pain and Feeling Frustrated?
I truly get it!
Subscribe now (it's free!) and receive our weekly Love Notes + More delivered straight to your inbox. PLUS receive four FREE printable I AM Wall Art. (This is one of them!)
This free resource will give you the exact words I use to help me keep going when I feel like giving up, hiding under the covers, or binge watching TV shows and shutting out the world.
They'll help you, too!
Gentle hugs + lots of love to you.